Top Ten

Worst Auditions I've ever had...

"She fails while daring greatly."- Theodore Roosevelt (For the record, I don't think he actually said this exact quote, but he's credited🤷)

Anyone ever wanted to know what it's like for an actor inside the audition room? Welp! I'm here to tell you. And I thought I would start with my most mortifyingly, terrible and sometimes so funny, audition room tales. 

These are all in no particular order, but if you're like me and get second-hand embarrassment easily...proceed with caution.

(Via GIPHY)

1. I went into an audition one time and they asked me what I was singing and I told them "I don't care" which was the name of the song. They both looked up at me in alarm and I panicked and totally backtracked and tried to make a joke, saying "But I do care...about this audition." Utter silence. They just stared at me. "It's the name of the song," I finished lamely. I sang and left the room as quickly as possible. 

2. One time, it had been raining outside and they were just getting to my name. I'd just walked back in from outside and quickly said I was there. I went to change my shoes and realized I had forgotten them at home🙅 So, I had no choice but to go into that room and sing with my rainboots on. I step on the wood flooring of the audition room and immediately slip and start to fall, I catch myself on the piano and look up to see the whole room just staring at me. I made some lame joke that I can't remember now and they continue to stare. I hand the pianist my music and then they proceed to tell me it's 8 bars instead of 16😂 

3. I hand the pianist my music and he gives me the kiss of death. "Oh, I don't know this song." I gave him my tempo and kind of hummed the tune, hoping he'd get it. I take my mark and he starts playing my song, too slowly and with a bunch of wrong notes. I try to keep going, but I stop and ask to start over. The woman in the room says, "Thank you for coming in." And I have no choice but to leave the room.

(Via GIF Tenor)

4. Ever forgot the words to a song? Ever forgot the words to a song in front of a whole panel of people? I was singing "Journey to the Past" (a very well known song) and totally forgot the words for about 8 bars and hummed at them. Couldn't get out of the room fast enough. 

5. At a callback once, I was singing a rock-type song, which is not my genre and was getting to a high note when a cracked and literally started laughing right in the middle of the song. They did not let me start over.

6. At a dance call back, I had forgotten my dance shoes (see a theme here?) and had to do the whole number in my bootie heels. It was a lot of getting up and down and finally I decided to just take them off and dance in my socks, and I fell...again. (Another theme??)  

7. One morning, I was taking my time to get ready when I checked audition update and saw that they were starting to get to non-equity. I rushed out of my apartment and got to the building, thinking I had made it. Turns out, right before I got to the room...they had called my name twice. I went to talk to the monitor and tried to charm him into letting me go with the group and he tapped the end of the very long list and said I could sign up at the end. 🤦 This has happened more than once unfortunately.  

8. It was a straight play audition (non acting friends, this means no music, just words) and I had prepared a monologue. I was ready to go, walked into the room, said the first line of the monologue...and COMPLETELY BLANKED. Could not come up with the next line to save my mother's life...I told them I blanked and they asked me to try again...same thing happened again. They said sorry and to come back again next year. 🙈

(A picture of my best friend and I (completely thrilled) waiting at an audition where one of these stories ~possibly~ happened.)

9. Walked in for a callback and literally had one line to say, in an Irish accent. Went in, said the line...and the casting director said, "That was Irish?" 

10. I was waiting in line outside of the audition room and I had two girls waiting to go before me. The first girl goes in and sings the song I was going to sing, and I have a mini panic attack and start going thru my book to find a new song to sing. I pick a new song and feel good about my choice. Until the next girl walks in and proceeds to sing my new song. Changed my song again, but messed up the words.

(Via GIPHY)

Bonus 1: Sometimes your audition has nothing to do with you and everything to do with things you can't control, like the producer getting up and leaving the room while you're singing. This has happened to me more than once and it never gets easier. 

Bonus 2: Not really an audition story, but one time, I was trying to get into a building for an audition and the front desk guy wouldn't let me up until I told him which floor, what was my business there, and why I had come at this time. This had never happened to me before, so I said, "I'm here for an audition" and waited for him to let me up, he didn't and just stared at me. We got into a bit of a fight and I truly thought I would never be allowed into the building again. He tried to keep my ID and I thought I was about to get arrested.  Thankfully, I never ran into that guy again.

As you can see, these audition stories are very common and I'm not the only actor to experience this or worse, but this is life. Embarrassing stories happen to everyone...they just happen to feel so much more excruciating when you're an actor. 😂

Next week? Another day in the life...this time in Dallas💕

<3

Em

What I'm listening to: "I guess I just feel like" https://open.spotify.com/track/1HNywa8Bk0TmzRwQrzhtPo?si=zH-OW20xSmaaZmKMKz83iA